One, I do not think anyone should ever comment on any one's weight period. I have been told numerous times "you are so skinny it is disgusting." I am sorry but the last time I checked being told you look disgusting is NOT a compliment. I do not want to hear any one's opinion on my weight.
Secondly, if I told some one "oh my gosh you are so fat you look disgusting" I would be fired from any job, and/or killed by the person I said that too. Yet when you are thin people think that your weight is up for conversation, well they are wrong.
Please do not tell me that I should take these comments as a compliment, or that when people say things to you it is because they are jealous. I do not care, I find it just as rude as if some one was to comment on an overweight persons weight issues. I had an incident at work recently where a coworker said "you are so skinny it is disgusting."
Well I went to my boss because I find this highly offensive and not something I should have to put up with at work. My boss told me that I need to simply tell the person that I what they are saying hurts my feelings, and that she was sure that the person meant it as a compliment. Well I think that is unacceptable. I told my boss that if the roles were reverse and I had made the same comment to an overweight coworker that I would be fired, and she AGREED, yet the punishment for the coworker that made comment to me was that my boss "would talk to her", but she would not be in trouble she just must not realize what she is saying to you is upsetting you." WHAT??? Are you kidding? If the roles were reverse the person making rude comments to an overweight person would be FIRED, but because I am not overweight, this person will only be "talked to"!
That my friend is what you call a DOUBLE STANDARD
So I did not ever confront this co-worker and over the months that comments have continued and I have said nothing. I am not one to confront people and I would feel like an idiot saying "you hurt my feelings". Well so yesterday this same co-worker made another comment. I was going to let it go but she caught me on a bad day as you can tell from yesterdays post. So I told my Husband and he said I should tell my boss, and the more I thought about it the more I thought I should too.
So I wrote my boss and email and this morning she came to talk to me. Then very shortly after that here comes the co-worker that made all the comments. She tried to sneak in my office and put a note on my desk but Bam I was sitting here and I said "Hi how are you?' and she proceeded to tell me she "was sorry and that she wishes she had my figure and (then another back hand compliment) she said I think of you as a girl, you have a girls figure." Oh so that is nice at 42 I have a girls figure! Thanks!
I do not think her apology of note was very sincere, I detected a note of anger and unhappiness that she had to be talked to by my boss not that she was actually sorry about her comments. So whatever at least she won't dare make another comment to me, but I am still upset that we have this HUGE double standard in our society.
I have another co-worker that is very thin and she has had the same issues with people at work and has been told the same thing as I by my boss, and it aggravates the both of us that we have to put up with this from our co-workers but yet overweight people here are protected more than us.
So I guess as always this is something I will just have to deal with. I remember as a kid and my entire adult life have do deal with these comments. I remember one time I had a job when I lived in California and I worked with this one woman who happened to be very over weight and she was constantly making rude comments to me. I called my mom in tears and she was so funny she made me a shirt on one side that said "why am I so skinny?" and on the other it said "because I am lucky." She wanted me to wear it to work so this co-worker of mine would see it and hopefully leave me alone. By the way, this co-worker in no way meant for her comments to me compliments she did it to just be mean.
I don't know maybe I shouldn't be so sensitive about people making comments about my weight, and actually sometimes I do take things they say as a compliment, but that being said I absolutely hate that there is a double standard when it comes to this.
Well there is my rant for the day!
The good news is my Husband and kid areout of town this weekend and I am going to have my own mini vacation ALONE! I am thrilled to be alone and have some me time. The problems is I started out not wanting to do anything this weekend but now I have a ton of things I want to do around the house I doubt I will have time to do them all much less get to be lazy like I want. I promise though I will get a couple of naps in.
Have a great weekend!
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